Monday, December 26, 2011

Family Values, High Morals, and Defending Marriage

Why do you suppose folks who rarely pick up a Bible can almost quote word for word the verses that they erroneously think condemn same sex relationships?

Why do you suppose these same people refuse to acknowledge the fact that the Bible calls their sins abomination?

Why do you suppose time after time, the same people are brought down for doing things that are less then ethical?

I have two sons.
I believe in family values.
I am married.
I have high morals, I have never cheated on my spouse.  I am honest, truthful and a hard worker.  I have worked for the same company for 20 years.
I believe in defending marriage.  I think that the decline of the family and marriage is appalling.
My family attends church regularly.
My Boys are boy scouts.
They attend AWANA every Monday night.
My boys are both exceptional students with straight A's.

How can people be against my family and my marriage?  How can people say that I am not for family values because I am a lesbianHow can people say that I am less than them and that I don't deserve the same rights as a heterosexual couple?

I would like for my marriage to be recognized by the State and Federal governments.  I would like to not have to hide my relationship for fear of bullying.  I believe that the government is responsible for the bullying of the Lesbian and Gay people because they have not made us equal.  Bullies will always pick on someone that they perceive to be inferior to them and the US State and Federal government's failure to recognize us as equal, feeds right into their bullying. 
I am not the exception in the Lesbian and Gay community.  I am the rule.  Our families....our values.... our morals.........  We are pro family.  We are pro marriage.  We are for family values.  We would like to be treated equally as our heterosexual counterparts.

How can the US Government refuse my family equal rights and equal protection?  To continue to discriminate against us is immoral, anti-family, anti-marriage, and unAmerican.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

When a Kiss is Not Just a Kiss

Petty Officer 2nd Class Marissa Gaeta won a raffle on the dock landing ship Oak Hill to be the first to kiss a loved one on its return to port in Virginia Beach. Petty Officer 3rd Class Citlalic Snell was waiting when she crossed the brow. Story

Congratulations to these young ladies.  While many folks may not understand the hoopla and the fanfare around all of this and the importance of this kiss, same sex couples everywhere hail this as a historical kiss.  
Bi-national same sex couples look upon this as it being sweet, sweet indeed.  However, there is a sense of jealousy and longing.  While these two get to hold each other and kiss for all to see, we hide in civil disobedience, talk on Skype, live in exile.  We wait for our country to give us equal (not special) rights.  

Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton made the historical speech to the UN about LGBT rights are human rights and human rights are LGBT rights.  We would like for that to extend to the United States of America.  We would like our human rights.  See Clinton's historical speech:


We would like to be able to kiss our loved one in public without fear.  We would like to be able to kiss our spouse without the worry that they will have to leave again soon.  We would like to kiss our sweetheart on American soil as they are granted legal status.

We are American Citizens who are in love with someone who is not an American Citizen.  We cannot sponsor them because we are of the same sex.  We are asking for the right to be allowed to be with our spouses.

While we are encouraged by this kiss, I look forward to the day when bi-national couples can "kiss in the sunlight and say to the sky...behold and believe what you see.  Behold how my lover loves me."

Monday, December 5, 2011

Christians vs Gays

Today I read where a teenager, who is gay, said the following, "...I know that God hates me..."
As a Christian, when I read that, my heart sunk.  When did we as Christians fail a whole group of people?  When did we think it was right to tell them that God hates them and their "lifestyle"?  When did we as Christians go from the Great Commission to passing God's judgement onto a people?

I know what Romans says.  It was written by Paul to the Church of the Romans.  I am not here to argue that.  I am not here to argue that the Bible never condemns a monogamous same sex relationship.  I am here to say that as Christians, we have failed to tell a group of people that God loves them.  We are too busy pointing out what the Bible says that we have failed to point out what the Bible says...yes I meant that.

We need to look and see how the Son of God lived His life on this earth.  He ate with the publicans and sinners.  That was the biggest criticism that the ruling religious body of the time had against Jesus.  Jesus chose to hang out with them to tell them of God's love.  John 3:17 says, "God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved."  So God's sole purpose of sending His beloved Son into the world was so that they could be saved.

Christians today seem to have forgotten that Matthew 28:19 &20 says Go and Teach ... not go and judge.  They seem to have forgotten that God calls lying an abomination.  They seem to have forgotten that the reason Christians are left on this Earth and not taken to Heaven immediately after conversion is to tell others of Jesus' love, death, burial and resurrection.

My wife and I signed our son up for the Baptist Church Preschool.  Why?  Because we wanted him to learn about Jesus dying on the cross to save him from his sin.  We wanted him to learn about the Almighty sending His Son.  We received a letter stating that the preschool had nothing to offer our son.  We have reason to believe that the reason why is because we told them we are a lesbian couple.  Not one time did any of those people offer to us the Gospel.  The Good News of the Saviour.  

I am a Christian.  I am a lesbian.  There is no conflict.  I have the peace which passes all understanding and the knowledge that "God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

One more observation/question:  When is the last time, as a Christian, you have picked up your Bible and read it...outside of Church.  When is the last time you actually prayed for the salvation of the Lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered people?  When is the last time you thought to actually study what the Bible really says about it with a prayerful attitude?

Thursday, December 1, 2011

The Holidays for Bi-National Same Sex Couples

As the holidays draw close, most people's thoughts turn to spending time with their loved ones, Christmas shopping and presents, large meals and family time.  For the 40,000 plus bi-national same sex couples, (estimated from the 2010 US Census)  the holidays often take on a different meaning:  Lonely separation. 

My lovely friend in Colorado will celebrate Christmas with her wife via Skype.  Her wife is British and lives in the UK.  In spite of her wife's extensive education, there is no "line" at the immigration office for this bi-national couple to get into.

My very dear friend lives in California, her wife, her legal wife (married in Canada and in California) will be in England due to the United States immigration discriminatory laws. These two ladies pose no threat to anyone, as a matter of fact, the Californian is a Military Veteran.  In spite of serving her country, her country refuses to acknowledge her marriage to her lovely wife from the United Kingdom.  They, too, will spend Christmas apart....touching their computer screens instead of holding each other.

 I have a friend on twitter who is struggling on telling her son (age 2) and daughter (age 6), that their "other" Mom's visa may not be renewed.  Another family separated by the so called Defense of Marriage Act and immigration discrimination.  Will they be able to watch their children open their presents....together as a family?

  Things that heterosexuals take for granted, spending holiday's with the family, watching the kids open presents, sitting around the dinner table, are things that bi-national same sex couples pray to be a reality soon.  

For a bi-national couple living exiled in New Zealand, you would think that life is perfect for them, after all, they are together legally.    Here is the two of them singing together a song that the Hoosier wrote for her New Zealand wife.  The Hoosier longs to "sit on the porch and have a beer with her dad in Indiana"     

These are just a few of my bi-national friends.  I could go on and on about friends living in exile in Canada and two other couples moving to Canada before the end of the winter season, but I won't.  I won't tell you of a lovely New York one of them is from New York the other from Italy... they struggle with issues that heterosexual couples would never even think about.  If they marry, will that cause problems with Homeland Security?  Will the New Yorker's lovely wife be "red flagged" by Homeland Security because of their marriage...even though it is legal in New York?

Think about us, think about the bi-national couples as you celebrate the holidays with your loved ones.  As you hug your sweetheart, know that others are just touching a computer screen.  As you snuggle with your children, know that bi-national couples are scared and worrying that their children will be torn from their non-US citizen parent.

There are some that live in the United States illegally, in civil disobedience, seeing this as the only option to be together.  Exile is not an option for some of these couples.  Moving to their partner's country is not an option in some of these cases.

Author, Judy Rickard, in a bi-national relationship herself, has written a book called

A repeal of DOMA needs to take place.  The passing of the Uniting American Families Act, needs to take place.  We are human beings.  We have families.  We have fallen in love with a person who is not a US Citizen.  We need to be allowed to be with our spouses...we need to be allowed to pursue our happiness.

Other Resources:
Stop the Deportations:  The DOMA Project
Immigration Equality
Lavi Soloway:  Attorney